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THE LEGACY OF GRIEF A STUDY OF A FACE

Faces express our emotions. They can be happy, cheerful, thoughtful, angry, sad reflecting any sentiment in between: faces are the measure of our feelings.

Recently I saw a friend one of whose parents had recently died. She looked sad and distressed; her eyes were red ringed from shed tears and her whole demeanour was one of loss in the clutches of overwhelming grief.

I longed to give her a hug, to give some reassurance to relieve some of her sadness but in the current circumstances we find ourselves, this basic contact is forgone. I wanted to tell her that even though her loved one had gone, they lived on through her, her children and her children’s children. For this is the legacy of life over death, one of the great joys of remembrance: it continues long after we have gone, through the next and subsequent generations. It is perpetuated through a mannerism, a glance, an appearance or briefest glimpse of the departed loved one.

We live on through our children and grandchildren. Death when it comes robs us of the company of a particular loved one and its mate grief can extract a dreadful toll in distorting memories but the physical legacy left is an expression of the essence of that person can see in yourself and children and your children’s children and is a far greater reminder of your lost loved one.

Love and remembrance will always overcome death and grief no matter what the future holds. My friend you might have lost the physical person but you have the indelible memory of past shared life experiences. Be grateful for what you had and weep not for what might have been, take joy in what is and always remember you had someone you loved and someone who loved you.